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[Imma stay at home if it’s all the same to you,lol]
Thursday, 12 September 2024 08:23Six words:Leaves Of Three Leave ‘Em Be.If you went to camp you had that drummed into your head constantly.
It refers to poison ivy. There are a bunch of related plants(poison sumac,poison oak and stinging nettle among them. )What’s amazing are the stories of poison ivy getting in nooks and crannies of the body that you didn’t even know that you had.And it’s UNCOMFORTABLE.
Fun poison ivy fact:it’s in the same plant family as cashews.I’ve mentioned that before and it’s amazing to me.I love cashews,but if given a bowl of mixed nuts I will always pick out the pecans first. Sorry, nut sorry(I saw what I did there!)
It refers to poison ivy. There are a bunch of related plants(poison sumac,poison oak and stinging nettle among them. )What’s amazing are the stories of poison ivy getting in nooks and crannies of the body that you didn’t even know that you had.And it’s UNCOMFORTABLE.
Fun poison ivy fact:it’s in the same plant family as cashews.I’ve mentioned that before and it’s amazing to me.I love cashews,but if given a bowl of mixed nuts I will always pick out the pecans first. Sorry, nut sorry(I saw what I did there!)
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[I thought that’s what he was singing for YEARS.]
Friday, 9 August 2024 11:13The Pogues, Fiesta
ML(Misheard lyric):Amarillo once again.
AL(Actual lyric):Almeira once again.
There’s a story behind this;I heard the song at a Jesus And Mary Chain show and wondered what the song was. I was going by my misheard lyric when I would search for it.
(Not sure why I thought someone would pronounce “Amarillo “ as “am a ree ohw” when it actually is pronounced “am a rill ow(like “pillow”.)
ML(Misheard lyric):Amarillo once again.
AL(Actual lyric):Almeira once again.
There’s a story behind this;I heard the song at a Jesus And Mary Chain show and wondered what the song was. I was going by my misheard lyric when I would search for it.
(Not sure why I thought someone would pronounce “Amarillo “ as “am a ree ohw” when it actually is pronounced “am a rill ow(like “pillow”.)
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[movie scenes to make me belly laugh]
Friday, 26 July 2024 16:41The food poisoning scene in Bridesmaids(if you want to know why I am anal about food safety watch that scene.)
Bohemian Rhapsody from Wayne’s World(almost got kicked out of the movie theater for laughing too loud.)
About A Boy,Killing Me Softly(you know that gif of Julia Louis Dreyfus from Veep with the caption *nervous chuckle * what the fuck? Yeah that.lol)
Mrs. Doubtfire can you make me a woman? Makes me lol every time.
The first Nutty Professor where they’re sitting at the dinner table.
Bohemian Rhapsody from Wayne’s World(almost got kicked out of the movie theater for laughing too loud.)
About A Boy,Killing Me Softly(you know that gif of Julia Louis Dreyfus from Veep with the caption *nervous chuckle * what the fuck? Yeah that.lol)
Mrs. Doubtfire can you make me a woman? Makes me lol every time.
The first Nutty Professor where they’re sitting at the dinner table.
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[Russell Crowe is an old soul]
Monday, 24 June 2024 07:02For the second time ever Russell Crowe is playing a exorcist.He has that prematurely grizzled look.*
I’ve heard it said (multiple times)that he should play Steve Bannon.YES! He is Steve Bannon’s brother from an an Antipodean mother!
*Crazy when you consider that Max Von Sydow was *43* when he played Father Merrin . Yep.That’s a LOT of old man makeup!
I’ve heard it said (multiple times)that he should play Steve Bannon.YES! He is Steve Bannon’s brother from an an Antipodean mother!
*Crazy when you consider that Max Von Sydow was *43* when he played Father Merrin . Yep.That’s a LOT of old man makeup!
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[Consider the teasing]
Friday, 24 May 2024 15:31There is a doctor on a show I watch occasionally.His first name is “Diarra”. Not the first time I’ve seen someone named Diarra, either.Kids are assholes and you know good and well what his nickname was in school.Seriously, I would be changing my name as soon as I could.(See also:why I would never name my daughter Maxine.)
Since when are people so obsessed with why their down there” smells.Literally there are multiple companies that sell “all over the body” deodorants. This kinda goes with the blog about people not washing that I posted recently.Though the people I mentioned probably don’t use deodorants because they think it causes cancer.
Since when are people so obsessed with why their down there” smells.Literally there are multiple companies that sell “all over the body” deodorants. This kinda goes with the blog about people not washing that I posted recently.Though the people I mentioned probably don’t use deodorants because they think it causes cancer.
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[A funny twofer]
Tuesday, 9 January 2024 07:25 Misheard Lyric:Down spout
Actual lyric:Don’t stop
(My dad and I were going somewhere in the car and Don’t Stop Believin’ was on the radio.So this is my dad’s misheard lyric !)
Watched a video on YouTube where a tested tried a broccoli and cauliflower gratin. The tester did not like it(to each her/his own).
I had the thought that you would want to be in a well-wentilated room after you eat it and and avoid smoking any and open flame.😀)
Alternative name:Dutch Oven Dinner😃
Actual lyric:Don’t stop
(My dad and I were going somewhere in the car and Don’t Stop Believin’ was on the radio.So this is my dad’s misheard lyric !)
Watched a video on YouTube where a tested tried a broccoli and cauliflower gratin. The tester did not like it(to each her/his own).
I had the thought that you would want to be in a well-wentilated room after you eat it and and avoid smoking any and open flame.😀)
Alternative name:Dutch Oven Dinner😃
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[Disney parks just got a lot less family friendly]
Tuesday, 12 December 2023 08:12Video about things that will get you thrown out of Disney parks. Thr second one..
”Weaing clothes”..
For context they mean clothes that are long,as they present a tripping hazard
(Though I do wonder with everything going on like the beer virus and how expensive tickets for Disney parka are now how true that is.)
The comments were comedy gold:
”Hearing “wearing clothes” *without* context”..
(SAME.)
”I just won’t wear anything at all”
(Disney just turned into a nudist resort..)
”Hope it’s not cold or sunny then”
(Never been to Disney World but I have been to Disneyland more than once on HOT days.)
“Disney is officially clothing optional”.
(I just got a mental image that no amount of brain bleach is gonna remove.)
”Weaing clothes”..
For context they mean clothes that are long,as they present a tripping hazard
(Though I do wonder with everything going on like the beer virus and how expensive tickets for Disney parka are now how true that is.)
The comments were comedy gold:
”Hearing “wearing clothes” *without* context”..
(SAME.)
”I just won’t wear anything at all”
(Disney just turned into a nudist resort..)
”Hope it’s not cold or sunny then”
(Never been to Disney World but I have been to Disneyland more than once on HOT days.)
“Disney is officially clothing optional”.
(I just got a mental image that no amount of brain bleach is gonna remove.)
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Anti cunt pills actually an empty box so you scan put whatever in it.)
Fresh out of fucks 2024 planner
Pooping puppies calendar /Dicks in nature calendar(which is exactly what it sounds like
Bad parking cards(“Learn how to park, asshole!”)
Soap turd bar.
Hairy ballsack key chain
“This is my cum rag” towel
“Once you put your meat in my mouth you’ll want to swallow” apron/
Fresh out of fucks 2024 planner
Pooping puppies calendar /Dicks in nature calendar(which is exactly what it sounds like
Bad parking cards(“Learn how to park, asshole!”)
Soap turd bar.
Hairy ballsack key chain
“This is my cum rag” towel
“Once you put your meat in my mouth you’ll want to swallow” apron/
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[Why yes, I speak Gen Y and Gen Z]
Monday, 27 November 2023 15:17I got a glow up* and it high key** looks fire ***
*Makeover
**Think it looks really good
***Really really really good.
Just heard the new TSwift song and it slaps* I saw her live and it was LIT**. Her performance as on fleek***.
*Really good
**Also really good
***On point
For someone who makes all his money from gritting ,TM is very bougie* He has so many weird flexes**.It’s very sus***
*Materialisitic
** Showing off(he does that a LOT.)
***Suspicious.
*Makeover
**Think it looks really good
***Really really really good.
Just heard the new TSwift song and it slaps* I saw her live and it was LIT**. Her performance as on fleek***.
*Really good
**Also really good
***On point
For someone who makes all his money from gritting ,TM is very bougie* He has so many weird flexes**.It’s very sus***
*Materialisitic
** Showing off(he does that a LOT.)
***Suspicious.
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[You’ll never hear it the same way ever again]
Thursday, 2 November 2023 07:19Heaven 17’s song “We Live So Fast” is the ultimate misheard lyric.
Misheard lyric:We live so fast, bullshit bullshit.
Actual lyric:We live so fast,motion motion/
I remember the first time I heard it and was rolling around on the ground laughing ..I was with my brother’s then girlfriend and she was like “I know what you think they’re saying but they wouldn’’t let tem say that on the radio(not true;They played Money by Pink Floyd un -bleeped for MANY years!)
Misheard lyric:We live so fast, bullshit bullshit.
Actual lyric:We live so fast,motion motion/
I remember the first time I heard it and was rolling around on the ground laughing ..I was with my brother’s then girlfriend and she was like “I know what you think they’re saying but they wouldn’’t let tem say that on the radio(not true;They played Money by Pink Floyd un -bleeped for MANY years!)
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[Not the first king to have a side chick it must be said🤣]
Wednesday, 9 August 2023 07:32Found some hilarious memes with Queen Camilla that said
To all the side chicks:there’s always hope and a picture of Queen Camilla(seems weird to say that it’s been almost a year already!)
There’s a ton of them:
To all the side chicks:Just believe(LOL)
Camilla is a role model for side chicks everywhere(That is debatable..
St. Camilla:Patron Saint of side chicks.
And a bonus: a coffee cup with a picture of Prince Charles that said “The Artist Formerly Known As Prince”.
To all the side chicks:there’s always hope and a picture of Queen Camilla(seems weird to say that it’s been almost a year already!)
There’s a ton of them:
To all the side chicks:Just believe(LOL)
Camilla is a role model for side chicks everywhere(That is debatable..
St. Camilla:Patron Saint of side chicks.
And a bonus: a coffee cup with a picture of Prince Charles that said “The Artist Formerly Known As Prince”.
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[Pun hundred percent]
Saturday, 17 June 2023 07:46Sorry for the Alexander Hamilpun.
Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.
Avoid dangerous cults-practise safe sects.
Get rid of the vacuum first.It’s been getting dirt on you for years.
Never fight with a dinosaur..you’ll get Jurasskicked.
Incontinence line-please hold!
When algebra teachers retire, do they deal with the aftermath?
Grandpa leapt around in his undies on July 4th-it was his in Depends dance day.
Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.
Avoid dangerous cults-practise safe sects.
Get rid of the vacuum first.It’s been getting dirt on you for years.
Never fight with a dinosaur..you’ll get Jurasskicked.
Incontinence line-please hold!
When algebra teachers retire, do they deal with the aftermath?
Grandpa leapt around in his undies on July 4th-it was his in Depends dance day.
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I was walking past a boy stroking feathers. I said “there’s no reason to feel down!”
I just crashed my Kia.Now I have Nokia.
Stealing someone’s coffee is called mugging.
Held the door open for a clown..it was a nice jester.
My horse is called Mayo.Sometimes, Mayo neighs.
What do you call a reluctant potato?A hesitater.
My only true friend was a loaf of bread.It was there for me when I kneaded it.
In Hawaii it’s illegal to laugh out loud..you have to keep it to a low “ha!”
A pun has not matured until it is full groan.
I’ve been telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes.It’s all about raisin awareness.
I just crashed my Kia.Now I have Nokia.
Stealing someone’s coffee is called mugging.
Held the door open for a clown..it was a nice jester.
My horse is called Mayo.Sometimes, Mayo neighs.
What do you call a reluctant potato?A hesitater.
My only true friend was a loaf of bread.It was there for me when I kneaded it.
In Hawaii it’s illegal to laugh out loud..you have to keep it to a low “ha!”
A pun has not matured until it is full groan.
I’ve been telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes.It’s all about raisin awareness.
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[Maybe they can use it for a lemonade glass]
Monday, 1 May 2023 14:15Looking on the CatStudios website for UCDavis(where my niece is going in the fall!) stuff.They have various categories,including different countries and different states(and colleges.) Shockingly, they didn’t have anything for UCDavis which is surprising because I could swear they did)
One of the colleges that was represented ?BYU. Two of the items were a drinking glass and a tumblr.
This had me “hunh?”
First of all Mormons don’t drink and secondly they don’t drink coffee. *points at subject line* When I was a kid I went over to my friend’s house(she lived right across the street).She was Mormon and it was always lemonade,water, 7UP and milk.
One of the colleges that was represented ?BYU. Two of the items were a drinking glass and a tumblr.
This had me “hunh?”
First of all Mormons don’t drink and secondly they don’t drink coffee. *points at subject line* When I was a kid I went over to my friend’s house(she lived right across the street).She was Mormon and it was always lemonade,water, 7UP and milk.
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[Be fruitful? 😂]
Saturday, 4 February 2023 11:10There’s a Facebook page where they take old Golden Book covers and photoshop them with funny titles/covers.
There was one with two babies on the cover and the title was “Pulling out isn’t always effective”.. Yeah! Pulling out is the reason there were so many larger families way back when because of pulling out and yep..how ineffective it is.
My dad comes from a family with 5 kids 3 of whom are close in age(my uncle was born in June of 1939 and my dad July the next year and my aunt T. a year and a half after that, then a gap because of the war and my aunts S. and F. within a few years of that.
If it were up to my dad there would have been 5 of us, my mom wanted 3 kids(at one point after they adopted me there was talk of a fourth child but they were happy with 3 kids.)
There was one with two babies on the cover and the title was “Pulling out isn’t always effective”.. Yeah! Pulling out is the reason there were so many larger families way back when because of pulling out and yep..how ineffective it is.
My dad comes from a family with 5 kids 3 of whom are close in age(my uncle was born in June of 1939 and my dad July the next year and my aunt T. a year and a half after that, then a gap because of the war and my aunts S. and F. within a few years of that.
If it were up to my dad there would have been 5 of us, my mom wanted 3 kids(at one point after they adopted me there was talk of a fourth child but they were happy with 3 kids.)
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[Caloriecino, amIrite?]
Tuesday, 17 May 2022 08:05*Worst Starbucks drinks:
Chai latte
(I LOVE chai lattes-my fall drink when I go there during the season.)
Hot chocolate
(Their hot chocolate used to be pretty meh but now it’s good.)
Chai Frappuccino
(I like chai HOT so I feel this.)
White chocolate mocha
Strawberry creme Frappuccino
Mocha Frappuccino
(WHEN I have Frappuccinos -which is not often -this is my go to.)
*Just gross:
Dragonfruit,mango,lemonade and espresso.
(I just threw up in my mouth a little.OK, a LOT.)
A order which is JUST this:4 Venti caramel Frappuccinos.
Chai latte
(I LOVE chai lattes-my fall drink when I go there during the season.)
Hot chocolate
(Their hot chocolate used to be pretty meh but now it’s good.)
Chai Frappuccino
(I like chai HOT so I feel this.)
White chocolate mocha
Strawberry creme Frappuccino
Mocha Frappuccino
(WHEN I have Frappuccinos -which is not often -this is my go to.)
*Just gross:
Dragonfruit,mango,lemonade and espresso.
(I just threw up in my mouth a little.OK, a LOT.)
A order which is JUST this:4 Venti caramel Frappuccinos.
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[Misheard Lyrics-it’s been a minute edition]
Sunday, 24 April 2022 10:53ML:Misheard Lyric
AL:Actual Lyric
OutKast.Hey Ya
ML:Shake it like a horny white preacher(!)
AL:Shake it like a Polaroid picture
Duran Duran,The Reflex
ML:I’ll punch that bitch when I find her
AL:I’ll cross that bridge when I find it
(Remind me not to piss Simon LeBon off, LOL)
Lynrd Skynrd, Sweet Home Alabama
ML:One of them gay does not bother me
ALWatergate does not bother me
R.E.M, Losing My Religion
ML:Let’s pee in the corner, let’s pee in the spotlight
AL:That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight
Bee Gees, Staying Alive
ML:Steak and a knife, steak and a knife
AL:Staying Alive, Staying Alive
AL:Actual Lyric
OutKast.Hey Ya
ML:Shake it like a horny white preacher(!)
AL:Shake it like a Polaroid picture
Duran Duran,The Reflex
ML:I’ll punch that bitch when I find her
AL:I’ll cross that bridge when I find it
(Remind me not to piss Simon LeBon off, LOL)
Lynrd Skynrd, Sweet Home Alabama
ML:One of them gay does not bother me
ALWatergate does not bother me
R.E.M, Losing My Religion
ML:Let’s pee in the corner, let’s pee in the spotlight
AL:That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight
Bee Gees, Staying Alive
ML:Steak and a knife, steak and a knife
AL:Staying Alive, Staying Alive
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